Erectile dysfunction: Learning to relax

For some men, being stressed may just make you irritable, but for others too much stress can cause sexual problems, such as erectile dysfunction (ED). For these men, learning to relax and ease stress is all that may be needed to treat ED.

What are some techniques I can use to relax?

To learn how to relax, you need to become familiar with your own breathing patterns and change them in ways that will help you relax. Your breathing pattern is often disrupted by changes in emotion. People who are anxious tend to hold their breath and speak in a high-pitched voice as they exhale. On the other hand, people who are depressed, tend to sigh and speak in a low-pitched voice as they exhale.

Below are a few relaxation exercises. But first, be sure that you have a quiet location that is free of distractions, a comfortable body position and a good state of mind. Try to block out worries and distracting thoughts.

• Rhythmic breathing: If your breathing is short and hurried, slow it down by taking long, slow breaths. Inhale slowly then exhale slowly. Count slowly to five as you inhale, and then count slowly to five as you exhale. As you exhale slowly, pay attention to how your body naturally relaxes. Recognising this change will help you to relax even more.
• Deep breathing: Imagine a spot just below your navel. Breathe into that spot, filling your abdomen with air. Let the air fill you from the abdomen up, then let it out, like deflating a balloon. With every long, slow exhalation, you should feel more relaxed.
• Visualised breathing: Find a comfortable place where you can close your eyes and combine slowed breathing with your imagination. Picture relaxation entering your body and tension leaving your body. Breathe deeply, but in a natural rhythm. Visualise your breath coming into your nostrils, going into your lungs and expanding your chest and abdomen. Then, visualise your breath going out the same way. Continue breathing, but each time you inhale, imagine that you are breathing in more relaxation. Each time you exhale imagine that you are getting rid of a little more tension.
• Progressive muscle relaxation: Switch your thoughts to yourself and your breathing. Take a few deep breaths, exhaling slowly. Mentally scan your body. Notice areas that feel tense or cramped. Quickly loosen up these areas. Let go of as much tension as you can. Rotate your head in a smooth, circular motion once or twice. (Stop any movements that cause pain!) Roll your shoulders forward and backward several times. Let all of your muscles completely relax. Recall a pleasant thought for a few seconds. Take another deep breath and exhale slowly. You should feel relaxed.
• Relax to music: Combine relaxation exercises with your favourite music in the background. Select the type of music that lifts your mood or that you find soothing or calming. Some people find it easier to relax while listening to specially designed relaxation audio tapes, which provide music and relaxation instructions.
• Mental imagery relaxation: Mental imagery relaxation, or guided imagery, is a proven form of focused relaxation that helps create harmony between the mind and body. Guided imagery coaches you to create calm, peaceful images in your mind - a “mental escape”. Identify your self-talk, that is, what you are saying to yourself about any problems you have. It is important to identify negative self-talk and develop healthy, positive self-talk. By making affirmations, you can counteract negative thoughts and emotions. Here are some positive statements you can practice.
  • I let go of things I cannot control.
  • I am healthy, vital and strong.
  • There is nothing in the world I cannot handle.
  • All my needs are met.
  • I am completely and utterly safe.