Lost your sex drive?

Are you or your partner losing interest in sex? A variety of physiological and psychological factors can impact your libido. Check out these common sex drive killers.

Sex drive killer: Stress

You may be the kind of person who does many things well when under stress, but feeling sexy isn't likely to be one of them. Job stress, money troubles, caring for a sick family member and other stressors can decrease libido. To keep your stress levels under control, learn helpful stress management techniques or seek the advice of a counsellor or your GP.

Sex drive killer: Relationship problems

Unresolved relationship problems are one of the most common killers of sex drive. For women in particular, emotional closeness is a major ingredient in sexual desire. Simmering arguments, poor communication, betrayal of trust and other barriers to intimacy can steer your sex drive off the road.

Sex drive killer: Alcohol

A drink or two doesn't always put you in the mood. Alcohol famously makes you feel less inhibited about sex, but it can also numb your sex drive. And even if it doesn't numb your sex drive, inebriation can be a turn-off for your partner. All of this goes for recreational drugs as well.

Sex drive killer: Too little sleep

If your sexual get-up-and-go is gone, perhaps you're getting up too early or getting to bed too late. Or maybe you have insomnia or sleep apnoea. Whatever it is that's interfering with your sleep, it's probably also interfering with your sex drive. Too little sleep creates fatigue. Fatigue can sap sex drive.

Sex drive killer: Parenting

Parenting itself doesn't kill sex drive, but it can be difficult to find time to be intimate when the children are under foot. Hire a baby sitter for some time to nurture your relationship. New baby in the home? Try fitting in sex during the baby's nap time.

Sex drive killer: Medication

Medications commonly linked to libido loss includes some:

• Antidepressants
• Blood pressure medications
• Antihistamines
• Oral contraceptives (some studies show a link; others don't)
• Chemotherapy
• Anti-HIV drugs
• Prostate medication
• Hormone treatments

Changing to a different medication or different dosage may solve the problem. Other medications may affect sex drive, too. If your sex drive slowed down soon after beginning a new medication, talk to your doctor or pharmacist. Never stop taking a medication without consulting your doctor.

Sex drive killer: Body Image

It may be difficult to feel sexy if your self-esteem suffers from poor body image. For example, feeling ashamed of being too fat (even if you’re not) may put out your love light. If your partner has these feelings, it can really help to reassure him or her that you still find him/her sexy. And there's another side to the equation: exercise can not only enhance your self-esteem, but also can boost your sex drive.

Sex drive killer: Obesity

Being overweight or obese is linked to a lack of sexual enjoyment, desire and difficulties with sexual performance. The reason isn't clear, but may be linked to self-esteem, unsatisfactory relationships, social stigma and other psychological issues.

Sex drive killer: Erectile dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction (ED) is a different kind of sexual disorder than loss of libido (a medical term for loss of sex drive). But men with ED worry about how they will be able to perform sexually. And that worry can drain their sex drive.

Sex drive killer: Low testosterone

Testosterone increases sex drive. As men age, their testosterone levels may decline slightly. Not all men lose the desire for sex when their testosterone levels drop -- but some do. Testosterone is linked to sex drive in women, too. But a woman's hormonal balance is more complex than a man's and many factors are involved. It's not at all clear whether testosterone therapy is as safe and effective in boosting sex drive for women as it is for men.

Sex drive killer: Depression

It doesn't seem fair. Many antidepressants can reduce your sex drive -- and so can depression. But if your sex drive has drooped, it might be a sign that you're depressed. Clinical depression is a serious, but treatable condition.

Sex drive killer: Menopause

About half of women report reduced sex drive around the time of menopause, even though they believe it important to maintain an active sex life. Menopausal symptoms, such as vaginal dryness and pain during sex, may make sex less comfortable. But the hormonal changes of menopause are only part of the picture. An ageing woman concerned about her sex drive should also consider the quality of her relationship, her body image and self-esteem, medication she is taking and her physical health.

Sex drive killer: Too little intimacy

Sex without intimacy is a sex-drive killer. Intimacy isn't just a code word for sex. If your sex life is going nowhere, try spending more non-sexual intimate time together -- alone. Talk, cuddle, trade massages. Learn to express affection without having to have sex. As intimacy builds, so does sex drive.

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