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Sex tips for men

Expert tips on how to help improve your sex life
WebMD Feature
Medically Reviewed by Dr Rob Hicks

Sometimes it's difficult being a man. Male sexuality is pretty straightforward but for women it's very different.

A few tips for men may help. Here's an insight by the experts into the female mind and body to help make sure sex is good for both of you.

Tip 1: Bring back the romance

Not just thinking of chocolates and flowers, but women do like their partners to be thoughtful. "The main complaint I get is women aren't wooed enough," says psychosexual therapist Denise Knowles. " Kissing - what happened to that?"

Denise, who works for the counselling organisation Relate, says men need to build day-to-day intimacies like kissing and touching into everyday life.

"Most men seem to think if you have a kiss it's a prelude to sex," she says. "You have to maintain a level of intimacy in general that doesn't always lead to sex."

Wellbeing expert, Naomi Martell says: "Be thoughtful towards your partner. It could be as simple as making a cup of tea for her in the morning."

Tip 2: Right time, right place

If you have a spare 10 minutes between shopping and picking up the kids, that could be a window of opportunity for sex for some men. Many women may prefer more time to get in the mood.

Sex expert and best-selling author Tracey Cox says: "Because of hormones, women feel like sex lots at certain times of the month and less (or not at all) at others. Men’s sex drives tend to be more consistent and more spontaneous."

"Sometimes women do want a quickie but sometimes women want a man to take their time and for the man to take an interest in them," says Denise.

"Men can have an appalling lack of timing," she says. "They don't seem to realise that you can't jump from changing a dirty nappy or reading Goldilocks and The Three Bears to having sex straight away."

Tip 3: Try something new

Denise says: "If you have been in a relationship for a while men can use the same pattern in sex. It's a bit same old, same old. You can almost predict exactly what’s coming next."

She says men can treat sex as more of a process rather than a pleasure.

Do something different, surprise her, she suggests.

Tip 4: Different women like different things

Men can assume that what works for one woman works for all women. That's not the case. What feels amazing to one woman may be excruciating to another.

Women are different shapes and sizes and have different personalities! What your ex-girlfriend liked may not be what your new lover likes.

"It's true men are interested in certain parts of a woman in bed," says Denise.

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